I've made a few mistakes in the past few months that have hurt myself, my husband and of course our marriage. Nothing major.. just small but yet big mistakes that effected us more than i thought it did or would at the time. (I guess that is my repentance statement).
So on top of getting back into prayer and daily conversation with my Lord, I am also choosing to surround myself with everything Godly and God-like. I am making a list of things to do in order to keep me accountable in my goal! I've made a list of books to read, devotionals to complete, volunteer work i can get involved in, and ways I can show God to someone else.
I started today with Beth Moore's devotional, "A Woman's Heart; God's dwelling place". It's an 11 week devotional that I can only expect will put me back in "Awe" of my God. I LOVE Beth Moore and the ministry she does, and i'm so excited to get into God's word with her.
I said that some choices I made have affected my marriage more than i thought they would. About a year ago, I bought the book, "The Love Dare" in an attempt to do as the book says and show love towards my husband. Well, i let the days pass by and never made it past day one. So, completing the Love Dare is also on my list. (Hopefully that doesn't ruin the process by me telling the world i am doing it? :) )
Travis and I also attended a marriage retreat back in october. They had a session over husbands showing their wives love and in return wives showing their husbands respect. I have to admitt that Travis has not been recieving the respect he so desperately needs from me as his wife. It's only been a couple of months since this retreat, and i have already failed. We were given a book (FOR FREE!), "Love and Respect" by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs. AGAIN, i told myself i would read that book and forever show the respect God demands me to show towards my husband. BUT i didn't and obviously "forgot" that love is followed by respect. SO, reading this book and putting it into action is also on my list.
There are several things I have to keep me surrounded by God and i have them all written down. These readings/activities/friendships and relationships are bound to keep me close to my God and strengthen my relationships.
I'm about to be a mom (woo hoo!) and I'm so worried that she'll see me do or say the wrong thing and she won't be able to see the good Lord in her own mother. I have to start taking my spiritual being more seriously, not just for myself, but for my family. I so depserately want to be a "Godly woman" role in my family. It is my prayer that God will break my heart and mold it into something new and fresh.
How is your relationship with God? I pray we are all surrounding ourselves with the love of God and reciprocating it to others!